Category Archives: Uncategorized
Every year I dream, 2016
Merry Christmas, everyone! I wish you pleasant dreams tonight, and joy in the morning. Lyrics from the song A Christmas Dream by Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rice Recorded by Perry Como (You can listen to the song and see some beautiful Christmas photos here.) Watch me now, here I go, all I need’s a little …
Strangers old and new
“Wherever I’ve lived my room and soon the entire house is filled with books; poems, stories, histories, prayers of all kinds stand up gracefully or are heaped on shelves, on the floor, on the bed. Strangers old and new offering their words bountifully and thoughtfully, lifting my heart. But, wait! I’ve made a mistake! how …
Like of each thing, 2016
This seems a most fitting post for me to re-blog, as I try to see through tear-dimmed eyes whatever gifts are there for me in this season of my life. Ann, the photo of Pasha is for you! And Happy Birthday to my dear friend Nancy, whose home was always open to Jeff and me …
To the sender
“While we tend to focus on the benefits of cards and letters to those who receive them, possibly the greatest benefit is to the sender…As I address and sign cards, I take a few moments to remember people who have played some role in my life, major or minor. I call to mind memories of …
The gift not yet opened, 2016
Hello everyone. Since I won’t be doing a Christmas tree this year, I thought I’d feature a photo of one from past years. If you have decorated a tree this year, feel free to send a photo to defeatdespair@verizon.net, and I’ll post it here. I hope you are finding some moments to enjoy this festive season. …
More present
He who has gone, so we but cherish his memory, abides with us, more potent, nay, more present than the living man. — Antoine de Saint-Exupery At times the pain of missing Jeff stabs me with a grief so severe and sudden that I wonder how I will survive without him. More often, though, I feel …
No pessimist, 2016
Just an opening reminder that the words below were written seven years ago today: Hello friends, I miss you, and I miss my time here. I hope your week has been better than mine. Even though I tried to prepare myself for this grief for nearly four years, it’s the sort of thing for which one …
Love at the board, 2016
Dear readers, this post from Thanksgiving last year still says it better than I could say it today. It’s a sort of visit from the Posts of Thanksgiving Past, to borrow a phrase from Dickens. At the time I wrote this, I honestly never expected that it would be our last Thanksgiving with Jeff. Despite the …
Absolutely, positively, certainly 2016
I’m still here. Hope you’re still there! Another reblog; originally posted on November 27, 2012: “In our rush for newer, quicker, better, we seem to be missing out on what we fundamentally crave, a calmer, gentler, sweeter and more gracious life. Is it easy to achieve such a life? Definitely not. Is it possible? Absolutely, …
Open to the day, 2016
Hello friends, I’m still treading water, but thinking of you. Please keep those thoughts, prayers and comments coming. They truly brighten my day, and I look forward to responding to each of you when I get a bit of a break – hopefully soon, as fall semester ends a couple of weeks before Christmas. Meanwhile, for now, another re-blog …
Live faithfully a hidden life
Update for 2023: Since this post takes a slightly different form, I wanted to add a note at the beginning, to make it obvious that the text below describes our circumstances in 2016, soon after Jeff’s death. Dear friends, thanks for visiting us today. We are still struggling with our loss, but surviving. Right now …
A luxury
“Today we enjoy a luxury kings and queens throughout history had to suffer without: water is available to us just by turning on a tap.” — Alexandra Stoddard I don’t stop to think about it often, but running water is among the blessings for which I’m most grateful. Imagine what it must be like to …
Through the rain
O Joy that seekest me through pain, I cannot close my heart to thee; I trace the rainbow through the rain, And feel the promise is not vain, That morn shall tearless be. —George Matheson Sometimes a poem, song, quote or Bible verse stored in my memory will become more relevant, and therefore more appreciated, …
The strength
“Faith is the strength by which a shattered world shall emerge into the light.” —Helen Keller I’m not exactly sure how we’ve gotten through the past three weeks, but somehow we have. Some days are much worse than others, but all of them bring small reasons to be grateful. I can acknowledge that in my …
The wise will know
If we call for the proof and we question the answers Only the doubt will grow Are we blind to the truth or a sign to believe in? Only the wise will know And word by word they handed down the light that shines today And those who came at first to scoff, remained behind …
The arabesques
The arabesques a hope can do… the dances dreams can make… the patterned pain a mind may shape… before a heart will break — Joan Walsh Anglund Despite the risk of heartbreak, hope is a better way to live. I really believe that. I am so thankful you are with us …
Rearranged
“Loss was like that…you didn’t just lose a loved one. You lost your heart, your memories, your laughter, your brain, and it even took your bones. Eventually it all came back, but different. Rearranged.” – Louise Penny For those who have noticed there was no post today, I wanted to add a brief explanation. Jeff …
Memory of the heart
“Gratitude is the memory of the heart; therefore forget not to say often, I have all I ever enjoyed.” — Lydia Child It’s not good to live in the past or long for bygone times. Ecclesiastes 7:10 reminds us “Do not say, ‘Why were the old days better than these?’ For it is not wise to ask such …
Whimsy and change
“Pretension and trendiness are pesky intruders. I try to swat them out of my studio while making tea for whimsy and change.” – Ellis Anderson My friend Ellis wrote those words years ago referring to her work in jewelry design. But I copied and saved them, even though I’m not an artist, because they apply …
Sufficient proof
“We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms — to …
Anything valuable
“Anything valuable is going to take time. Be patient and tolerant with yourself and others.” — Alexandra Stoddard I think technology is training us to be impatient. Recently I turned on an old computer so I could use it while the one I typically use was in the midst of a lengthy maintenance procedure. At …
More often
“Certainly there are good and bad times, but our mood changes more often than our fortune.” — Jules Renard Not only that, but we can have bad moods during good times, and good moods during bad times. Have you ever wondered how this could be? I know I do. There are similar mysteries in life. …
September Days
…September days are here, With summer’s best of weather, And autumn’s best of cheer. — Helen Hunt Jackson Don’t you just love this time of year, when the weather begins to cool down just enough to be refreshing, and that crisp hint of autumn is in the air? Jeff and I …
Wonderful, magical and more
“This world, after all our science and sciences, is still a miracle; wonderful, magical and more, to whosoever will think of it.” — Thomas Carlyle One of the surest ways to defeat despair is to stop and experience something totally amazing. A star-studded sky at night or a sparkling sunlit ocean are obvious choices, but …
Defeat Despair 