Sealed inside
As usual, Pasha stood hanging on Jeff’s every word, November 2008.
“Don’t be ashamed to weep; ’tis right to grieve. Tears are only water, and flowers, trees, and fruit cannot grow without water. But there must be sunlight also. A wounded heart will heal in time, and when it does, the memory and love of our lost ones is sealed inside to comfort us.” Brian Jacques
People often laugh at my habit of taking photographs for seemingly no reason at all, but from where I sit now, I am so glad that I did. So many memories are preserved in sharper detail than my mind could hang onto without help.
The other day I got out the digital photo frame that Jeff used to keep on his desk at work. It had been packed up with the many framed photos and other items that he brought home after retirement, and we never got around to unpacking it during the few months he had left.
Jeff was a notoriously difficult person for whom to choose a gift, because he didn’t really want much. This was one of the gifts I gave him that he most appreciated and enjoyed. The nearly 700 photos I had loaded onto it in the beginning were meant to be supplemented with others, which turned out to be just another good intention. But those 700 photos featured a lot of variety.
Going through such memorabilia is slow work for me, as I can only handle it for short periods of time. I was a little afraid to plug the frame in, and indeed, watching it did bring waves of sadness. However, as the lovely photos of our family, friends and travels scrolled on, the sadness was alleviated somewhat by the wonder of all those years together, all those memories. I heard my voice saying aloud “What a life we had!” and it was more an expression of thanks than a lamentation.
I have the digital frame sitting nearby as I write this. I don’t plan to unplug it anytime soon. It brings both water and sunlight into my life.
This post was first published seven years ago. Now that I am grieving the death of my sister and lifelong best friend, these words are more true for me than ever.
The original post, comments and photo are linked, along with two other related posts, below. These links to related posts, and their thumbnail photos, do not appear in the blog feed; they are only visible when viewing the individual posts by clicking on each one. I have no idea why, nor do I know how they choose the related posts. That’s just the way WordPress does things.
- Posted in: Uncategorized
- Tagged: appreciation, digital frames, family, gratitude, grief, loved ones, memorabilia, memories, photography, photos, pictures, remembrance, sadness
Defeat Despair 
Dear Julia,
Somehow I must have missed it. What happened to your sister? Caring thoughts to you as you grieve your sister and best friend. c
Hi Carol, SO SORRY it has taken me so long to respond here. I just sent you an email with the details of what happened. Thanks for being here, and for caring. ❤
Hi Julia, Thnx for the reference to your sisters passing. If it’s not too personal I was wondering what happened to her. I understand it was sudden and yet another heart break on your plate. Prayers always, c
Sent from the all new AOL app for iOS
Hi Carol, awhile back when I saw this comment (but didn’t immediately have time to respond here) I sent you an email explaining what happened. I hope you got it, but if not, let me know and I’ll re-send it. Yes, my thoughts exactly…”yet another heartbreak.” My biggest battle now is to convince myself that I cannot expect anything BUT heartbreak as I grow older…Thanks so much for your prayers! I honestly believe that prayers are what keep me afloat through all this.
Hey! Thinking of you. Praying for peace and comfort; and that the sunlight comes.
Thank you Chris. I have been surviving on prayers for a very long time now, and that has built up my faith in the power of prayers to get me through whatever comes.
Julia,
A lovely post. It is said that one picture is worth 10,000 words.
But a tear can represent either joy or sadness. And it touches the hearts of so many that are countless beyond words. Every moment in our lives is captured in our own minds and hearts and in that are so memorialized that no number of photos could ever capture them all. Though no one in this world could ever be affected by them there is One who has been there to capture each unique moment for eternity. Even those we may not be able to recall ourselves. For every hair on our heads have been counted, even those we no longer have from our birth to our last breath and heartbeat.
So cared for are we all.
-Alan
Thank you, Alan, for describing the truth that brings so much comfort in dark times. I’ve found lately that all my prayers begin with a simple phrase: “Lord, you know all things.” It’s quite an anchor for the soul, isn’t it? Thanks for being here, and for caring!
It certainly is. My pleasure as always.
-Alan
Good morning, Julia!
As I was going through my Uncle Roy’s things, I repeatedly found banker’s boxes full of slides. I found a working slide projector and started going through them. What I didn’t sort through while still staying at his place, i brought home and sorted here. At some point, I located an old friend of his that had been interested in my uncle’s car photos, so I set those slides aside as i went through them, and eventually delivered about six banker’s boxes FULL of slides to that gentleman. Meanwhile, I also set aside all slides of family and friends that I recognized. Needless to say, this has been quite the journey! And I still have one remaining box yet to go through ….!
I’m glad that you have also found some solace in the many photos you have, as they remind you of many, many wonderful times!
Susan, I am so thankful that you have been willing and able to treasure your Uncle Roy’s things, and to see that they are passed along to others who will appreciate them. I’ve heard from quite a few people lately that such caring has become extremely rare, and I’ve seen firsthand how true that is. Now that my sister is gone, I know that nobody will ever care enough about the minutiae of my life to go through all that I will leave behind, so one of my goals is to try to sort through it as much as I can, while I still can. It’s very difficult work, though, because so much of it is freighted with emotion. I have to accomplish it in baby steps. I suppose that’s why so many people leave so much behind. Kudos to you for taking on this labor of love!