The true magic carpet
With a little help from Disney, Drew and Matt take an imaginary trip to Morocco.
EPCOT Center, Orlando, Florida, August 2003
“Imagination is the true magic carpet.” — Norman Vincent Peale
Even when we aren’t free to travel because of health, finances or responsibilities, our minds are always free. And now, with the entire world available literally at our fingertips, through words, photos, music and videos, our minds have even more fuel for our imaginary journeys.
If you’re reading this, you are looking at a computer or mobile device with internet access. Quick — where would you most like to go right now? What place on earth would you travel if you could be there instantly? Do an online search, and click on “images” or “videos” or even “music” in the search results. Almost anyplace you can think of in the entire world will have at least a few photos available to bring that faraway place within the reach of your thoughts for a five-minute vacation.
I realize there are elaborate scientific explanations as to how all this is possible. I know it’s all zeroes and ones, and we have engineers to thank. I know all that. But I still think it’s magical.
Have an enchanted day – and send a few photos of your make-believe travels!
One year ago today:
Until I write
A surprise in the mail from Boomdeeville is a beautifully reassuring reminder
that what is unique and memorable can very seldom be rushed. January, 2014
“I cannot see what I have gone through until I write it down. I am blind without a pencil…But it does seem a slow and wasteful process. (Like walking, tapping with a cane.)…There is so much waste in creativity, always. But there is something curious about creativity: the trying-too-hard for results seems to defeat itself.”
— Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Sometimes when I look at all my husband and others like him have accomplished, I feel woefully inadequate, tapping away at my keyboard, addicted to reading and writing as I have been for as long as I can remember. I often feel guilty for not producing anything more substantive, even though I have never had to rely upon it as a source of income.
Yet, as Lindbergh attests, there is no such thing as forcing results when it comes to creativity, no matter what form it takes. Because I tend to think and talk rapidly, it took me years to realize how much more slowly I work compared to most people I know. In crafts, in photography, even in cooking and household tasks, I find that I’m unable to function well under time pressure. I can get things done, but there is no satisfaction in anything I have rushed through.
For me, it’s much more rewarding to complete something slowly and thoughtfully, not in a perfectionist, nit-picking way (an easy trap to slide into when time allows it), but in an attentive, relaxed state of mind. Given the rushed nature of modern life, it’s easy to become impatient and see a relaxed pace as a waste of time. In reality, though, perhaps haste really does make waste. Even if the end result of rushed work is satisfactory, there may be collateral damage to our moods, our relationships or the flow of our day.
Next time you feel impatient with yourself for “wasting” time, think about what you are doing, and how you feel about it. Is it really less wasteful to spend thirty minutes on unhappy, pressured and self-imposed stress, rather than spending the hour it might take to actually enjoy what we are doing? Wouldn’t our time be better invested in savoring the pleasant details of our lives, focusing on the quality of what we do rather than quantity?
Admittedly, leisure is not always possible. But it might be a worthy goal to give ourselves periods of time when we are off the clock, free to go at a natural pace, focusing on the process more than the product. I have a sneaky suspicion that even the mundane details of work would be more interesting if our minds were not in a hurry to move on to something else.
What activities are more enjoyable to you when not rushed?
One year ago today:
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Every stretch of road
Every stretch of road has meaning…even this one near Delle, Utah, August 2004.
“A route differs from a road not only because it is solely intended for vehicles, but also because it is merely a line that connects one point with another…A road is a tribute to space. Every stretch of road has meaning in itself and invites us to stop.”
– Milan Kundera
With only a week to drive from the west coast to the east, there was very little to tempt us to visit places such as Delle, Utah when we moved from California to Virginia in August 2004. The heat alone was enough to dissuade us from stopping. However, I agree with Kundera that every stretch of road has its own meaning. And who knows what we may have missed by driving quickly through?
In reality, life is simply too short, and the demands of living too intense, to allow us to explore every stretch of road we travel. Through sheer necessity, we will use them as routes more far often than we will be able to wander along them as pathways.
But once in awhile, life throws us a curve ball and we get stuck in a place we didn’t intend to stay. Whether it’s a car breakdown that grounds us for a few hours, extreme weather that stops us for a few days, or a temporary job assignment that ends up taking weeks or months longer than we expected, a discoverer’s mindset can lessen the frustration of detours and delays.
Next time you find yourself with more hours than you care to have in any particular place, remember Kundera’s thoughts. If your route unexpectedly becomes a road inviting you to stop, take advantage of whatever hospitality you can find. Take out your camera (if you have one with you) and ramble a bit. You may never again see that particular spot of the planet in quite the same way.
One year ago today
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Up and doing
One week before surgery, Jeff prunes away the overgrowth in our wooded lot, May 2013.
Let us, then, be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait. — Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
If a few short words could sum up the past 18 months of Jeff’s life, it would be hard to find any more appropriate than these. The photo above was taken one week before he was hospitalized with the first of two major surgeries to resect metastatic tumors. He had just finished months of gruelling chemotherapy, and despite being beset with the usual side effects of fatigue, nausea, and acute neuropathy, he continued to work full time (except on days when he was taking treatment) and at home, kept up with most of his many chores.
He always knew how to labor, but waiting does not come naturally to him. However, he has probably spent more time waiting in these past 18 months than in the rest of his life combined. How difficult to wait when one is tired, worried, and far behind on the responsibilities of the workplace and home. How much more difficult when one is waiting on outcomes that will literally mean life or death! Yet he has managed it beautifully, and his faith has not wavered despite enduring a level of physical trauma and suffering that probably would have killed me or almost anyone else I know.
One of the most essential character traits we could develop is the ability to have “a heart for any fate.” I think Longfellow realized one key to this is to be “up and doing.” I am not as good at this as Jeff is, but with his example, I may yet learn.
One year ago today:
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What grandparents do
Dinnertime at Granny’s! And you wont believe how delicious it will be.
Granny in her dining room, sometime around 1973.
“Nobody can do for little children what grandparents do. Grandparents sort of sprinkle stardust over the lives of little children.” — Alex Haley
I’ve written about my mother’s wonderful mother. I didn’t mention my other grandmother, or either grandfather, but suffice it to say that my siblings and I hit the lottery jackpot when it came to grandparents. The great thing about the grandparent lottery is that it has way more winners than losers!
My grandmother was a fascinating person to me. Because her father and her husband were both much older than typical for women of her age, she had the distinction of being the daughter of a Civil War veteran, and the widow of a Spanish American War veteran. According to family lore, her great-great aunt was Eliza McCardle Johnson, America’s first lady following Mary Todd Lincoln. But Granny was interesting to us long before we were old enough to understand any of that.
When it came to having fun, Granny gave us more attention than any other adult I can remember. Unlike our busy parents, she had time to play Scrabble, Monopoly and other games with us – and taught us to play well and by the rules, never (as far as we could tell) letting us win just to appease us. She was a real ace at Scrabble because of her expert-level crossword puzzle skills. She knew more two-letter words than anyone I’ve ever known.
She was an extraordinary seamstress, but unlike my mother, an equally skilled seamstress who made all the clothes for my sister and me, Granny made fabulous outfits for our Barbie dolls. Each year at Christmas, my sister and me, along with our cousins Judy and Kay, could expect to get new Barbie wardrobes, with exquisitely trimmed evening gowns, square dancing dresses (with matching shirts for Ken), chic street-length dresses and fun, casual separates. The cheaply made store-bought Barbie clothes were obviously inferior despite their plastic accessories, and our couture Barbie wardrobes furnished many happy hours of dress-up play for our friends as well as for us. When we got too old for Barbies, my sister and I filled an entire suitcase with our Barbies’ wardrobes!
Granny’s house was enchanting. It was the same home she had been born in, before the turn of the century, and my Daddy was also born in that home. It had been remodeled and was well kept over the years, full of interesting historic objects and yet-untold stories. The kitchen had an ancient walk-in pantry and an antique cabinet with a built in-flour sifter. That kitchen was the source of the only cooking that, in my mind, could possibly rival my mother’s. My little brother learned to head straight for the kitchen as soon as we arrived at Granny’s, looking for the M&M cookies that he knew he would always find there (a special treat we only got at Granny’s house).
And speaking of untold stories, Granny never seemed to run out of them, though we had to coax her into telling them. She had met and married our grandfather during his years as an actor and director in a traveling theater troupe, and she spent the early years of their marriage in that same company, touring, singing and dancing. Once in awhile, if we kept after her long enough, she would pull out her old photographs of her show business days, and they were spellbinding. It’s likely that Granny’s old photographs were influential in my own love of photography.
Though she lived into her 90’s, Granny was sharp and lucid to the very end, and even left us a final gift of a letter written to each one of us, leaving them with my Aunt Norma to be mailed after Granny died. In her letter to me, she urged me to enjoy my children and play with them often. She left us a good example of how to do that, one I hope I was able to follow.
Undoubtedly, our grandparents have influenced us in ways too numerous to count or know. What memories do you have of your grandparents? Share some of your own stories of how you, too, hit the jackpot in the “grandparent lottery.” Remembering the love of our grandparents is a great way to defeat despair!
Happy birthday to my sister Carla, who shares so many of my happy memories of both grandmothers!
One year ago today
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On my farm
No wonder he wanted to go back!
This is the view from Washington’s porch, Mount Vernon, Virginia, April 2010.
“I had rather be on my farm than be emperor of the world.” ― George Washington
Washington didn’t just say those words, he lived them. At the close of the American Revolution, and again at the end of his presidency, he willingly set aside his power and returned to Mount Vernon. Strolling the grounds of that beautiful estate, it’s easy to understand why. Washington was a farmer long before he was a Revolutionary War hero or President, and that was the role he never gave up.
Today we honor the memory of Washington and another great President, Abraham Lincoln, who also was acquainted with farm life as it was lived on the American frontier nearly 100 years later. While neither of these men found their way into the history books because of their agricultural activities, it seems likely the time they spent working under the rigorous demands of nature became an integral part of the strength that would define their leadership.
Today, on President’s Day, I hope you will take a few minutes to enjoy the timeless pleasures that still come to us from farms. We can do one thing neither Lincoln nor Washington could do, powerful though they were: we can walk into a grocery story and buy fresh fruits and vegetables with literally dozens of choices, even though it’s deep into the winter. That’s something any emperor in history might envy!
One year ago today:
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Some kind of recreational activity
Coffee as recreational activity: Virginia Beach in the snow, January 31,2014
“It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity.” — Dave Barry
I know people who have a genuine medical need for coffee, and I’m not one of them. I have a genuine medical need for tea, but I do sometimes engage in coffee as a recreational activity, especially if I can get eggs and hash browns with it.
Recently southeastern Virginia, where our York home is located, got a rare heavy snowfall, Under the circumstances, we did what anyone would do: we went to the beach. Seriously, the roads were pretty clear, and I was up for breakfast at the Belvedere again; it was a rare opportunity to see Virginia Beach covered with snow, and we didn’t even have to wait for the table with the best view. So rest easy, Dave: I did not keep anyone in dire circumstances waiting for their coffee.
If anything, breakfast at the Belvedere is MORE fun in the snow, especially with delicious hot coffee and a cozy booth with a great 180 degree view. Apparently lots of people share our enthusiasm for snow-covered beaches, because I snapped many photos of joggers, bikers and indulgent canines walking their human companions through the powdery white stuff. The waves kept crashing as always, totally unimpressed with the temperatures, and the sun perked everything up.
So coffee as a recreational activity is perfectly suitable for the beach, especially when it snows!
One year ago today:
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Rivers are roads
Jeff and Matt pause at an overlook on the York River, June 2012
“Rivers are roads that move.” — Blaise Pascal
I’ve always been fascinated by maps; I could literally sit and study them for hours. One of the first things I noticed as a child, when I would look at maps, is how the cities of America seemed to cluster along rivers and coasts. There’s a logical reason for that, of course, but it’s one that is often lost on us in these days of interstate highways and air travel. There was a time when rivers were the primary roads.
Even when we didn’t live on the coasts, we were always near rivers, and I’ve enjoyed them all. Yet I seldom think of them as roads to discovery, preferring instead to sit in one place and watch them flow by. But sometimes I daydream about how much fun it would be to have a boat and go traveling by water, stopping at places along the way and making discoveries I might miss on land.
Our York home sits near several rivers — the York, the James, the Elizabeth — as well as Hampton Roads, Chesapeake Bay and the Atlantic Ocean. Every time I go to the Yorktown waterfront, I enjoy it so much I tell myself I’m going to start visiting more often, if only for an hour or so each week, but when I’m home I’m busy with tasks and seldom make the time.
I think one thing I find so appealing about rivers is, even if I’m not traveling down them, other people are. Seeing the boats come and go, and the water flowing into the horizon, out of sight, reminds me of opportunities, possibilities, undiscovered wonders. I’ve heard people say “the road is calling” and perhaps rivers, as roads, call us in the same way.
Do you live near a river? If so, do you ever use it as a road for travel?
One year ago today:
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The last thing on my mind
We’d only just begun: Jeff and me in May, 1978.
“I don’t understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine’s Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon.” — Author Unknown
Let’s just say I’m not a typically romantic woman. I’ve tried reading contemporary romance novels, but I can’t seem to finish one; I find them boring, insulting, or both. I don’t like expensive restaurants, fine wines or pricey jewelry. I don’t find Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt or George Clooney appealing at all; I much prefer Dustin Hoffman or Gary Sinise.
I had no desire whatsoever for a big wedding, and in fact, I spent as little time as possible planning ours, with every bit of my wedding outfit borrowed from friends. I couldn’t wait for it to be OVER. I didn’t want a wedding, I wanted a marriage. (OK, and a honeymoon!) 🙂
When it comes to romantic relationships, I’m an oddball. In fact, until Jeff came along, I wasn’t sure I’d ever really love anyone. But when I fell, I fell hard, and it stuck. Our relationship has been far from an easy one, but he’s still my one and only Valentine.
This year, I find myself having come full circle from the time the photo above was taken, nearly 36 years ago. Now as then, I find myself wishing for many more holidays with Jeff, all too uncertain as to whether I will be granted my wish. But also, now as then, I am feeling more optimistic each day that these wishes — OUR wishes — will come true.
Yet feelings are notoriously unreliable, aren’t they? Sometimes. In this case though, I think my optimism is as well founded as it was then. Maybe our fairy tale isn’t a typical one, but despite a lot of anxiety and sorrow, it does seem to have more than its share of “happily ever after.” I choose to believe that pattern will continue. Meanwhile, I celebrate the joy of NOW, and of knowing the odds for Jeff’s survival have improved considerably over the past year.
On this day we associate with hearts and flowers, I wish for you the happiness of HOPE for a future full of love and joy. Happy Valentine’s Day! Please click here for a Valentine — and the chance to design (and save) a virtual floral arrangement!
One year ago today
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It takes courage
Crocus blooms at Keukenhof, March 2007
“It takes courage to be crocus-minded…Highly irregular. Knifing through hard-frozen ground and snow, sticking their necks out, because they believe in Spring and have something personal and emphatic to say about it.” — Jo Sorley
Deciding to have faith and hope isn’t always easy, but it is a decision, and one that comes more naturally for some than for others. If you find your spirits drooping a bit, think of the hardy crocus. It’s always a welcome sight, eagerly popping up to be the first to greet springtime. Those early flowers bring us joy long before the steady warmth of the sun lures us outdoors.
As we move ever closer to another spring, I wish you many harbingers of the beautiful season to come. Have a crocus-minded day!
One year ago
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From a single source
A garden at Northside Hospital in Atlanta, where I spent some memorable hours in July 2013.
“At the deepest level, the creative process and the healing process arise from a single source. When you are an artist, you are a healer.” — Rachel Naomi Remen
Often we think of art as something that hangs in a frame on a wall, but in reality the work of countless artists surrounds us so pervasively that we scarcely notice it most of the time. The photo above was taken in a lovely little garden at Northside Hospital in Atlanta, where I was able to spend some quiet moments during the long day of waiting for Grady to be born. Megan had checked in the night before and labor was induced early that morning, but Grady was not letting anyone hurry him, and he didn’t show his face until almost 9:00 p.m. that night.
I had spent many long hours in hospitals for most of the preceding year, so it wasn’t a difficult wait for me. However, I was eager to see our grandson, and increasingly anxious to know all would be well. I escaped to that little garden more than once that day when the waiting area became too dull, and was outside there when Drew’s friend Paul (who was staying in touch with the delivery room via texts with Drew) called me to report that they had decided to do a C-section.
Being a physician, Paul was able to give me enough details to reassure me that this was a sound decision based on avoiding risk of complications from prolonged labor, and not an emergency situation. Everyone was fine, and I would be seeing our grandson in an hour! So the photo above brings back a lot of happy memories about the night Grady was born.
A variety of artists made that healing little garden a reality. Landscapers, architects, and woodworkers joined forces to create a perfect setting for the sculpture of a newborn baby lovingly held in two hands. In the years since it was finished, I believe hundreds of nervous family members must have found calm and solace in that serene space, as I did.
I’m so thankful for the imaginative spirit that each of us has, in some measure, which we use in various ways. Whether you are engaged in producing art, or appreciating the work of others, I hope your life will be touched today with the healing power of creativity.
One year ago today
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Great things
I’m glad someone built the road that allowed me to photograph this sight. June 2000.
“Great things are done when men and mountains meet.
This is not done by jostling in the street.” — William Blake
I like these lines from Blake, because they remind me that obstacles need not be setbacks. In a few well-chosen and memorable words, he acknowledges the stamina life requires of us, the potential for tremendous achievement, and the tendency for trivial distractions to become more formidable challenges than the mighty mountains themselves.
If you are facing a steep uphill climb in any aspect of your life, I hope these words of Blake will stick with you and inspire you. Great things are accomplished when men and women focus on worthwhile goals, no matter how daunting, rather than allowing life to be consumed by minor details and annoyances that won’t matter much in the end. Admittedly, it can be difficult to tell the difference between the urgent and the important, but it’s a skill worth developing.
What mountains are you facing? What jostling do you need to ignore today?
One year ago today
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The sun a spark
The sun was so striking on this late afternoon walk in March 2013,
I just had to go all the way back to the house to get my camera.
“The days are short
The sun a spark
Hung thin between
The dark and dark.” — John Updike
One thing I like about this time of year is the gradual lengthening of daylight hours. It still turns dark far too early, several weeks away from the onset of Daylight Savings Time. But I know that each day we will have a bit more light, and that’s something I find energizing and motivating.
It sounds trite, but spring really will be here before we know it. What ideas for this year are hatching inside your imagination? What will you do with that first delicious touch of warm weather? Planning for it is half the fun!
One year ago today
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Bright, loud, weird and delicate
I photographed this monkey in Roatan, Honduras, in March 2011.
“I wish I could convey the perfection of a seal slipping into water or a spider monkey swinging from point to point or a lion merely turning its head. But language founders in such seas. Better to picture it in your head if you want to feel it…I spent more hours than I can count a quiet witness to the highly mannered, manifold expressions of life that grace our planet. It is something so bright, loud, weird and delicate as to stupefy the senses.”
― Yann Martel
I’ve made no secret of my lack of respect for most television programs, but I love the way TV has enabled us to see animals in ways that were never possible before. While nothing can replace the thrill of encountering a wild animal face to face, such encounters are brief at best, and can hardly give us a true representation of these fascinating creatures.
Matt loves to watch PBS and Animal Planet, both of which sometimes stop me in my tracks if I pass through the room when an interesting animal show is on. It’s really tempting to sit down and watch, even if I don’t have time. In any case, I’m happy that Matt gets so much enjoyment from watching them.
Martel is right that words are inadequate to describe animals in all their stunning variety, but photos and especially videos can give us the next best thing to a real-life encounter. And a well-made nature film, or really even a funny amateur YouTube clip, is a great way to grab a quick escape from the stresses of everyday human life.
If you’ve spent any time at all on the internet, you must surely have a few favorite animal videos. Feel free to send us some links to share here – and let’s have a wild time!
One year ago today
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Restraint must enter
Such beautiful dishes at the Grand Bazaar in Istanbul!
It was impossible to choose — so I didn’t. May 2008
“An element of abstention, of restraint, must enter into all finer joys.”
— Vida D. Scudder
I think one of the nicest things we can do for ourselves is learning to enjoy things without wanting to own them. This is trickier with some things than with others, of course, and what appeals to the eyes may vary from person to person. But I find that “shopping” for things I like but don’t need, and have absolutely no room for, is excellent training in appreciating what belongs to others. When I know there is no way I will be buying something, that eliminates the decision making and frees me up to really see what I’m looking at, unencumbered by price or other practical considerations.
Museums can serve this purpose, but for sheer variety of colors, styles and bling, you can’t beat a good shop. And many specialty shops are excellent places to develop the skill of just saying no to ownership. Jewelry stores, furniture stores and very pricey clothing stores often fall into this category, giving us ideas and inspiration without costing a cent.
For me, looking at china is great practice in restrained shopping. There are so many fabulous patterns, with new ones coming out all the time, and the entire spectrum of colors is represented. Since I don’t have room for more china than I already have, there is no question of buying any of it, so it’s a perfect purchase-free joy to look at dishes to my heart’s content.
(It’s ironic that, as I write this, I am awaiting delivery of service for ten from the west coast, but that’s a topic for another post…)
What do you love to look at while shopping, with no intention of buying? Start with something delightful that you find it easy to say “no” to, and then move into more difficult exercises in impulse denial. It’s fun – and good for the soul AND the wallet!
One year ago today
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Repainting the landscape
Snow accents our neighbors’ beautifully hardy evergreens, January 2010.
“Nature has many scenes to exhibit, and constantly draws a curtain over this part or that. She is constantly repainting the landscape and all surfaces, dressing up some scene for our entertainment. Lately we had a leafy wilderness; now bare twigs begin to prevail, and soon she will surprise us with a mantle of snow. Some green she thinks so good for our eyes that, like blue, she never banishes it entirely from our eyes, but has created evergreens.” — Henry David Thoreau
As I write this (a little over two weeks before it is scheduled to be published) there is a pristine blanket of white outside, spreading over every unpaved bit of ground, unspoiled as yet by footsteps. This recent snow was unusually powdery, blowing about and leaving drifts against the windowsills, a rare sight here in Virginia.
Though the snow is dazzlingly bright in the sun, I am glad for the remnant of blue and green in the landscape; a sky that looks remarkably like the ones we see in springtime, and evergreens that seem bundled up with their thick foliage, unharmed by the single-digit temperatures of the past 24 hours.
I hope we all hold within our imaginations the blues and greens of warmer days, a sort of internal immunization against the gloom that can overtake us in winter. How delightful to have the beauty of snow along with just a hint of the colors that will delight us in the springtime days that lie ahead!
One year ago today
Impressions of beauty and delight
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The history of liberty
Holocaust Museum banners in Washington DC remind us our actions matter, April 2013.
“Liberty has never come from the government. Liberty has always come from the subjects of it. The history of liberty is a history of resistance.” — Woodrow Wilson
“That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed; That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it…” — Thomas Jefferson, from the Declaration of Independence
Whenever a government moves to uphold or defend freedom, it’s easy to get confused and think that the freedom came from the government. In reality, freedom is secured by governments, not granted by them, and even that happens only insofar as governments act in accordance with the will of the governed. One need not look far into the history books to find confirmation of Wilson’s assertion that the history of liberty is inextricably bound up with resistance to governmental tyranny.
There is a difference, of course, between oppression and unpopular legislation. I think people on either end of the political spectrum are far too quick to refer to anything they disagree with as “facism,” and to liken any political opponent to Hitler. Such words begin to lose meaning when they are tossed about as hyperbole, and desensitization to their concepts is dangerous.
It’s important to recognize, especially in a democracy, that the will of the majority must not disregard the liberty of the minorities. Thus the sometimes inexorably slow and cumbersome process of governmental checks and balances will test the patience of citizens who care passionately about their country’s actions and policies.
The great thing about having lived through many years of alternating dominance of one political party or another is that it gives us a sense of how it feels to be on either side of the equation. We’ve all felt elation when elections or court decisions went the way we hoped they would, and disappointment or even despair when they did not. If nothing else, it should give us a measure of sympathy for each other, regardless of our differing affiliations and ideas.
The next time you find yourself in either a winning or losing political position, remember that the liberty we all claim to value has never been uniformly and consistently available in all aspects of life. To value liberty is to accept the inevitability of disagreement, and the best we can do is act, speak and live in ways that will keep such conflicts in the realm of civil discourse. The most inhumane atrocities had their beginnings in tiny seeds of prejudice, anger, blame, malicious rumor and disrespectful behavior.
The history of liberty is indeed a history of resistance – including resistance to gratuitous hostility.
One year ago today
The one who thinks differently
This post was first published seven years ago today. Since I first began re-publishing these posts in early 2020, I have thought many times how surprising it is that many of them still seem as relevant as when they were written. This post, though, is the first that actually seems MORE relevant now than when I wrote it in 2014. I hope people will read it thoughtfully, and consider the ideas herein.
The original post, comments and photo are linked, along with two other related posts, below. These links to related posts, and their thumbnail photos, do not appear in the blog feed; they are only visible when viewing the individual posts by clicking on each one. I have no idea why, nor do I know how they choose the related posts. That’s just the way WordPress does things.
Our neighbors
Typical late afternoon traffic in Washington, DC, April 2013
“While the spirit of neighborliness was important on the frontier because neighbors were so few, it is even more important now because our neighbors are so many.” — Lady Bird Johnson
Almost everyone I know would like to make the world a better place. We long to do great things, to make a difference. For some reason, though, it seems harder to aspire to the little graces, like letting people merge in traffic when we have the right of way.
Crowds of people can be so irritating, whether standing in lines, waiting on a restaurant table or service, or dealing with noise levels we find annoying. Patience seems harder and harder to sustain. We might want to bring peace to all the world, but don’t ask us to give up our seats on a packed bus!
A lot of us handle this by avoiding crowds and withdrawing into solitude, and this can be a healthy response if we don’t carry it too far. But sooner or later, we will all want and need neighbors, whether we admit that or not. And each of us bears the responsibility to be good neighbors to those whose paths we cross.
Other than the aforementioned traffic courtesies, what are some other ways we can be good neighbors?
One year ago today
This post was first published seven years ago today. It’s interesting to contemplate how the pandemic may have affected our ideas about crowds. Have you been relieved that crowds are now mostly outlawed? Or have you had an overdose of solitude? Will we be more, or less, neighborly whenever the pandemic is in the rear view mirror?
The original post, comments and photo are linked, along with two other related posts, below. These links to related posts, and their thumbnail photos, do not appear in the blog feed; they are only visible when viewing the individual posts by clicking on each one. I have no idea why, nor do I know how they choose the related posts. That’s just the way WordPress does things.
A repository of possibilities
A City Guides tour of stunning Pacific Heights, January 2004
“Walkers are ‘practitioners of the city,’ for the city is made to be walked. A city is a language, a repository of possibilities, and walking is the act of speaking that language, of selecting from those possibilities. Just as language limits what can be said, architecture limits where one can walk, but the walker invents other ways to go.”
― Rebecca Solnit
I’ve always thought that walking is the best way to really get to know any place — a neighborhood, a city, the woods, the mountains or the beach. So much is more easily visible to those who go exploring on foot.
While we lived in northern California, I used to love to go into San Francisco and just spend the day walking around. I would be so absorbed in what I was doing that usually I would not stop to eat lunch (except for maybe an energy bar or some fruit), and I would not even miss eating. I joked to Jeff about my “San Francisco diet” because, between walking up and down all those hills and skipping the snacks and lunches, it was a great way to lose a few pounds!
I especially loved the free City Guides Tours, which offered fascinating commentary and history on various neighborhoods. Since the tour guides were all volunteers who were there simply for their love of the city and the fun of introducing it to others, there was lively discussion and time for lots of questions. Often, those who were on the tours were visitors from other cities who offered up interesting information about their own home towns.
There may be a similar program in a town near you, but even if there is not, I highly recommend taking a day sometime soon to go exploring on foot. When we take vacations, we make time for discoveries that we might never get around to in our own home cities and counties. Perhaps an afternoon “mini-vacation” is just the ticket to brighten up a dull winter week. If you do go exploring in your local area, send us some stories or photos – we’d love to take a virtual stroll with you!
One year ago today
This post was first published seven years ago today. Perhaps the ideas about local exploration through walking are all the more relevant today, as Covid-19 is still restricting travel and many other activities.
The original post, comments and photo are linked, along with two other related posts, below. These links to related posts, and their thumbnail photos, do not appear in the blog feed; they are only visible when viewing the individual posts by clicking on each one. I have no idea why, nor do I know how they choose the related posts. That’s just the way WordPress does things.
Sharing their experience
A Huichol yarn artist in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico, March 2004
“I want to thank anyone who spends a part of their day creating, I don’t care if it’s a book, a film, a painting, a dance, a piece of theater, a piece of music – anybody who spends part of their day sharing their experience with us – I think this world would be unlivable without art and I thank you.” ― Steven Soderbergh
I want to add a special thanks to those who create with great love, but without much notice or recognition; those whose art takes the form of everyday work such as crafts, meals, garments, or other useful expressions of caring, and those whose art will never bring them fame or wealth, but brings us all a richer existence. Keep your creative spirit alive! It is a gift from above.
One year ago today
And a salute to three of my favorite online artists:
For a fantastic window on Latin America, visit Zeebra Designs and Destinations
To see stunning nature photography, visit Northwest Photographer
Bird lovers will be delighted to land at talainsphotgraphyblog
This post was first published seven years ago today. The original post, comments and photo are linked, along with two other related posts, below. These links to related posts, and their thumbnail photos, do not appear in the blog feed; they are only visible when viewing the individual posts by clicking on each one. I have no idea why, nor do I know how they choose the related posts. That’s just the way WordPress does things.
To be commanded
A gardener in Mykonos, Greece, tending his plants. May 2008
“Nature, to be commanded, must be obeyed.” — Francis Bacon
This seeming paradox is one that every gardener knows well. We can exert a strong influence over our gardens, if…
If we observe the individual traits of our plants, our local soil, and our weather. If we are regular and disciplined in tending them. If we practice preventive measures such as weeding and pest control (I prefer organic methods as much as possible).
Even if we do all of these things, however, there are no guarantees. Maybe that is part of the fun of gardening; we never know quite what to expect. But if we hope to achieve good results, we must obey as much as we command – perhaps more.
At this time of year, I’m sure I’m not the only one whose thoughts are turning toward getting outdoors and working on lawns, gardens, flowers, vegetables and other plants. Which commands have you learned to obey, and which to issue?
One year ago today
This post was first published seven years ago today. The original post, comments and photo are linked, along with two other related posts, below. These links to related posts, and their thumbnail photos, do not appear in the blog feed; they are only visible when viewing the individual posts by clicking on each one. I have no idea why, nor do I know how they choose the related posts. That’s just the way WordPress does things.
Intended for solace
A flower merchant decorates a sidewalk in Barcelona, May 2008.
“Flowers seem intended for the solace of ordinary humanity.” — John Ruskin
You’ve probably noticed that I have been intentionally choosing themes that are linked in some way to the posts I did on the same day one year ago. The first couple of times when this happened accidentally and readers commented on it, I realized it was a helpful way to narrow down potential topics. It enables me to get the posts done more quickly. So I plan to continue this unless readers start complaining that the links are repetitive. I’ll try to keep them different enough to be worth glancing at again.
It does seem that the first day of February is an excellent time to start anticipating springtime, which for many of us means anticipating flowers. Ruskin is right; natural beauty, so colorfully epitomized by flowers, is universally available for appreciation (even though some of the more fabulous views may have limited accessibility due to location, ownership or entrance fees).
Flowers, though, bloom everywhere, and are cultivated and harvested by talented gardeners and merchants who want to spread the joy. If you can’t visit a botanical garden, there are still displays to be found wherever there are people. I just love it that grocery stores often feature floral departments with fresh flowers in abundance. I can hardly run into a grocery, even for one or two items, without taking a minute or two to enjoy their colors and fragrance.
I hope you will make some time today (or soon) to seek out the solace of flowers. They are visual music, a balm for the spirit and food for the soul!
One year ago today
This post was first published seven years ago today. The original post, comments and photo are linked, along with two other related posts, below. These links to related posts, and their thumbnail photos, do not appear in the blog feed; they are only visible when viewing the individual posts by clicking on each one. I have no idea why, nor do I know how they choose the related posts. That’s just the way WordPress does things.
Consider having fun
Having fun in the rain, then and now:
Drew and Matt wearing the SAME PONCHOS at EPCOT Center in 1995 and 2003
“If you only do what’s important, you’ll never have any fun, unless you consider having fun important.” — Ashleigh Brilliant
If you don’t consider having fun important, I hope you’ll think about it and change your mind! Recently we had a discussion in the comments here, about end-of-life wishes, and things people wish they had done more often. A lot of the wishes center on doing fun or important things – often both. But one thing nobody in our family will probably ever say is “I wish we’d gone to Disney parks more often,” since we enjoyed more than our fair share of visits there.
We love Disney, at least the Disney movies that were produced up through the mid-1990’s, and all the classic characters. And we never tire of going to the Disney parks; we’ve literally lost count of how many times we’ve gone to either the California Disneyland parks, or the Walt Disney World parks in Florida. We never got too old to enjoy it, and some of our happiest memories happened there.
The photos above were taken more than eight years apart, in almost exactly the same location at EPCOT Center — and the boys are wearing the EXACT SAME RAIN PONCHOS! I am not making this up. (I told you I never threw anything away.) I bought each of us a rain poncho right before we visited Walt Disney World in 1995, while we lived in Hawaii, and we found them so useful I kept them and took them along on every subsequent Disney trip, long after the boys were wearing adult sizes. The great thing about a poncho is that one size fits all.
When we had some rain during our 2003 trip to Disney World (taken to celebrate Matt’s 18th birthday) Drew thought it would be fun to get another photo like the one we had taken so many years before. I don’t know which was more fun, taking the photos or comparing them years afterward!
I hope you are making time for enjoying funny moments with people you love, and maybe preserving those memories in photos or journals, or both. Someday it will seem way more important than it might seem now.
Happy Lunar New Year!
One year ago today
This post was first published seven years ago today. The original post, comments and photo are linked, along with two other related posts, below. These links to related posts, and their thumbnail photos, do not appear in the blog feed; they are only visible when viewing the individual posts by clicking on each one. I have no idea why, nor do I know how they choose the related posts. That’s just the way WordPress does things.
Distance lends enchantment
Green up close, blue far away: distance changes how things look.
The Blue Ridge Mountains, western Virginia, July 2005
‘Tis distance lends enchantment to the view,
And robes the mountain in its azure hue.
— Thomas Campbell
Time and memory don’t always improve the way things seem to us, but often they do. As with the old saying about the weather, if you are unhappy today, wait a while. Although it may be hard to imagine, there will almost certainly come a time, probably fairly soon, when things appear at least a little bit better than they do right now. And it’s even more likely that someday you will look back on these years of your life and feel better about them — either happy they are in the past, or happy for the good times they held, which you can see with more clarity from a distance.
One year ago today
This post was first published seven years ago today. The original post, comments and photo are linked, along with two other related posts, below. These links to related posts, and their thumbnail photos, do not appear in the blog feed; they are only visible when viewing the individual posts by clicking on each one. I have no idea why, nor do I know how they choose the related posts. That’s just the way WordPress does things.
A sunny spirit
Matt and Drew in 1986, laughing together as they still do so often.
“Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritation and resentments slip away, and a sunny spirit takes their place.” — Mark Twain
Of all the things that have helped us survive the past thirty years, and even before that, I would have to say that humor is near the top of the list. I cannot count the times when a good laugh has lightened everything up for us. If someone asked me to name the trait I value most in both our sons, it might well be their robust sense of humor.
Years ago when the boys and I were visiting my parents, we decided to take the MARTA train into Atlanta for some reason or other. I have forgotten what we did in town that day; what I remember most is something memorable that happened on the way home.
It was right around rush hour in the afternoon, and our train was crowded. Somewhere between West End and College Park, after the train had gone above ground but was not near a station, it began to slow, grinding to a stop seemingly in the middle of nowhere.
For a couple of seconds a hush fell over our car, and then something wonderful happened. As if on cue, almost everyone in the car burst into laughter. It was so contagious, it was hard not to join in. As we sat there — I don’t remember how long, but it might have been ten or twenty minutes — there was a relaxed, almost party atmosphere as people engaged in lively speculation about what was going on, and how long it might be before it was fixed.
What surprised me most was the complete absence of any impatience, irritation or annoyance from anyone I heard. It was as if we were all caught as extras in some sitcom episode or comedy movie, enjoying it to the hilt. It was most unexpected, and makes me smile to this day when I think about it. The car eventually started up again, but the memory of that temporary stop lingers on.
I’ve wondered about it a good bit over the years. Why did these people react with such spirited humor? I tell myself that maybe it was something about the relaxed good will of Atlanta (I can’t imagine that happening on the New York subway) or the southern African-American culture (we were the only white people in our car) or maybe it was just the sunny weather of a beautiful day in a lovely city.
Whatever the reason, the experience left me indelibly impressed with the power of humor to turn bad situations into good ones. I hope you have had many such experiences, and will have many more. Feel free to share some of them in the comments!
One year ago today
This post was first published seven years ago today. The original post, comments and photo are linked, along with two other related posts, below. These links to related posts, and their thumbnail photos, do not appear in the blog feed; they are only visible when viewing the individual posts by clicking on each one. I have no idea why, nor do I know how they choose the related posts. That’s just the way WordPress does things.
Defeat Despair 
